Inadequate Monster

have you met the inadequate monster? or maybe his sister the imperfect demon? the can surprise you in moments when you thought you were pretty confident. or sometimes they lurk for days, weeks, months, years. Telling you you're not good enough. That no matter what you do you're still a failure.

image source

Banishing your inadequate monster and imperfect demons isn't an easy task. Unfortunately heavy swords, garlic cloves don't work well, and a prince in shining armor won't get very far. Because even when you've found that prince, those monsters can still find you. 

What can you use to fight these monster? I've found mantras help a lot. (need some ideas-go here) It's like your spell to keep those demons away. 10 deep breaths always help. In every situation. Sitting with the feeling and exploring why it's there, and what past events may have triggered it, is a good first step in telling it to leave you alone. Because you need to protect yourself. To get on with your life and leave those demons slayed behind you.

Best of luck in your battle! What will your sword be?

Dance Because You Can

 Image Source

Happy Friday!

Let Go of the Guilt

Guilt can weigh you down. And most of us feel guilt over things that do not warrant it like taking time for ourselves, eating a food we've previously labeled as "bad", forgetting to call someone back, leaving the dishes in the sink, purchasing new clothes, you name it! The list goes on and on. But if we harp on these things, we are spending too much energy on undeserved guilt and not enough focus on the great things life has to offer. Once you put down the guilt, the weight of the world seems a little lighter, and you open yourself up to opportunities that will bring you happiness.

 Image Source

It's much easier said than done, because we have been conditioning ourselves for a lifetime to feel guilty over things that bring us joy and health like eating, sleeping, sex, shopping, working...the list is exhausting! Can you imagine the amount of time you would have if you stopped wasting it worrying about things? Everyone deals with these feelings, including myself. So join me and take it step by step and really give some thought to how you might build your own path toward enjoying life and appreciating yourself for who you are.  

Let us know what you're thinking and how you plan to achieve your goals for less guilt. Better yet, send a guest post to iamguiltless@gmail.com. We love hearing from you.

Abusive Relationship

It seems like every day a new client comes into my office in a very abusive relationship. One that I'm always shocked to find that none of her friends, parents or coworkers have ever mentioned anything about. One that has been going on for far too long. One that eats her up inside, but that she can't seem to shake. A very abusive relationship with food. "Yesterday was a good day." "I stayed awake for awhile before bed just thinking about the bad choices I made. Feeling guilty about that ____(piece of cheese, doughnut, cake, meat, you name it!)" "I cut all my meals in half-but my body still won't lose weight." Letting their lives be controlled by food-letting it dictate where they go out to eat, who they see, and what they order. If someone was having that much remorse or joy pulled from their life from an intimate relationship I would hope someone would have intervened to stop it.

And I guess that's my job. To step in and help take the power away from food. Because when we dig ourselves into these abusive relationships with food-where our mood and our self-worth hinge on what we eat, we are giving food an awful lot of power. Food is Food. An inanimate object that is fuel for life. Eating it doesn't make you any better of a person than abstaining. It is just fuel. Not that it can't be delicious, gross, phenomenal, or so-so depending on who cooked it.

It doesn't happen over night. And it takes a lot of work. Especially when you've been dieting on and off for more of your life. Taught that food was the end all be all. That food, and eating less, and getting smaller would make you a better and happier person. Sorry to crush dreams, but that's not where dieting will get you. But maybe it will get you to seek real help. Help to get back in tune with your body and learn again to listen to your hunger, while respecting your fullness. Help to learn about what can really fuel YOUR body-since every body is unique and just not made out for a cookie-cutter diet.

One more note-if you have 2 minutes today I'd love for you to read these true stories of women who quit dieting. I found them so inspiring!

Here's to an empowering and amazing week!

Imperfect

We loved this image on Super Hero Journal and just had to share! be sure to check out this great blog

How well do you know yourself?

In this fast-paced world, we tend our push ourselves beyond our limits mentally, physically, and emotionally. But this type of stress can result in injury to our bodies and our brains. How well do you know your own limits?

In order to be our most productive, we must work hard, but that doesn't mean we should sacrifice our own health. Here are a few signs that you're going the distance, but maybe a little too far:

1. You sleep less than 7 hours every night.
2. You skip meals and just making up for it later in the day.
3. You push yourself to exercise even when you feel fatigued or when you are sick.
4. You accept every single social invitation you receive.
5. Even after a good day, you can't help but feel you didn't do enough.


If you experience one or all of these situations, it's time to reverse! Give yourself the attention you deserve. Allow your body to rest and give it the nutrition it needs to be strong and healthy. Take a break once in a while and enjoy yourself. And remember, if you did the best you could that day, it was more than enough. Be well and enjoy the day.

Loving Ourselves

Loving ourselves creates a life of joy and fulfillment.
— Louise L. Hay

I know it sounds cheesy but I swear it does.  I have clients come in who hate their bodies, hate food, hate the way the two are related, hate the way the use both. And I swear bringing a little love and acceptance into that relationship changes lives. It's not easy and it takes a LOT of work-it's definitely not something you wake up the next morning saying "hey everything's GREAT now!" No. It's step by step, little by little. Eating something that makes you feel guilty and seeing that nothing bad happens. It's buying an outfit that you've been avoiding. It's waking up and doing the work to get yourself to a better place. 

Image source

Here's to positivity. New Days. New Directions. New Hope. New Changes. New Life.